Raising
children with spirituality
By Jimmy Henderson (Hons BA (Phil), MA (psych), FRC
Spiritual experience is no longer limited to
religion, with many people and families who would not be considered
‘churchgoing’ or religious in the true sense of the word, reporting an
awareness and relationship with a higher spiritual power (God). This
relationship can be achieved by merely becoming more conscious of oneself,
nature and the world and usually begins with a healthy curiosity and a sort of
inner motivation to seek the truth. This points one in the direction of
articles, books and people which have a more holistic approach to life and
spirituality and eventually one develops a framework which includes a concept
of God or the Universe which makes more sense in terms of your real-life experiences.
If one wishes to raise children in a
spiritual environment, there would therefore be two questions to first
consider. One, do you wish to raise this child in a traditional religion in
which the spiritual practices involve regular church attendance and prescribed
training in the scriptures?, or second, do you wish to offer them a more open
and holistic view of the world and of spirituality and formulate your own
spiritual programmme designed to fit the specific needs and development of your
child?
If you are already part of an organised
religion and church fellowship and find that your spiritual needs are
completely satisfied by your involvement in this church and the doctrines
presented, and are quite willing to have your child raised in this framework,
then much of your responsibility for the spiritual upbringing of your child can
be handed over to the church, which usually has a formalised scriptural study
programme for children from pre-school to early adulthood in the form of Sunday
school, catechisms and youth events. This would merely have to be supplemented
at home with instruction in prayer and dealing with any questions that the
child may raise with regard to the religious instruction being presented.
However, if you, as parents, are not
completely satisfied with the traditional religious path or even with your own
religious experience within the church, there is a more holistic approach which
involves a direct personal involvement in the spiritual life of your children.
The
holistic approach
For this approach, your role would be more
that of a facilitator, exposing your children to a framework of holistic
spiritual concepts and ideas, providing encouragement and support in their own
search for spirituality and allowing them to unfold naturally at their own
pace.
When working with small children under the
age of 5, a good start to this framework would be talking about the meaning of
‘right’ and ‘wrong’ and the positive reinforcement of actions and ideas in line
with the universal laws of love and compassion (This should, in any case, form
part of the socialisation process for any child). At this time, your personal
example to the child will be very important, as children use their parents as
role models.
Appropriate to the child’s age, new ideas
could be introduced such as soul and spirit, consciousness, the concept of a
Supreme Being, divine Intelligence or guiding principle, as well as universal
concepts such as tolerance, respect, brotherhood and love. If you wish, this
knowledge can be related back to sacred scriptures, as this approach does not
necessarily include a break with traditional religious practices, unless they
are exclusive.
Exposing the child to these issues would
encourage questioning (and a child is ready for an answer when he /she asks an
appropriate question). Children are naturally curious and will ask questions
about everything. And if you wish to consciously direct them towards
spirituality, your answers should be related to spiritual ideas that you would
wish them to incorporate. At this time, your aim should be to cultivate a
questioning mind, self-awareness and a love of Spirit, nature and people.
In terms of this approach, as children
mature they should be exposed to a variety of spiritual ideas from scriptures,
books, articles and by attending holistic events and festivals. They should
also receive training in prayer and meditation and the availability of
spiritual guidance and support. Once again, open-ended question-and-answer
sessions should continue, especially with regard to any spiritual experiences
they may have had, such as dreams, visions or contact with angels and other
spiritual beings. These experiences should be fully explained to them and they
should be encouraged to document them in a journal. It is important that
children be encouraged to begin thinking for themselves, allowed to formulate
their own set of spiritual ideas and learn to interpret their own experiences.
Later on, age-appropriate training in the further
exercise of spiritual faculties can be introduced, such as advanced forms of
meditation, imagery and conscious inner work. This could involve training by
other mentors as well as courses suited to their emerging abilities.
In conclusion, I wish to appeal to you as an
enlightened parent in modern times, to assume a more flexible view of
spirituality and not try to force your child into a mould which does not fit
his or her particular personality and spiritual gifts.
Jimmy
Henderson a well-known metaphysical teacher and regular radio talk show guest.
He is the author of many articles as well as two self-help books titled
‘Multi-Dimensional Thinking’ and ‘Multi-Dimensional Perception’ which are
available at Exclusive Books , Amazon.com and Kalahari.com. He is also
associated with Metavarsity and
based in Durban , South Africa
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